06 Nov 2012
by scolgin
in Food, Humor, Observations
Tags: Arles, bacon, food, fougasse, Malibu, popcorn, porkcorn, Topanga Vintage Market
My friend and fellow elementary school dad, Thad, approached one morning asking a favor. Some Topanga folk had started a monthly antique fair at a nearby mall recently, and the school had a fundraising bake sale table at the event. Would I consider baking something for the table? Of course, I said.

Porkcorn, ready for sale
A short time later, I received an email from the woman in charge of the fundraising table, thanking me for being a part of their “healthy bake sale.” More
28 Sep 2012
by scolgin
in Humor, Observations, Starlets, Yoga Students & Quinoa (stories)
Tags: bacon, clarified butter, food, ghee, humor, license plates, tofu, turkey bacon, yoga
A friend of mine at a design firm where I do contract work a couple days a week makes herself some turkey bacon every morning. You can smell it when you walk into the break room.
I began referring to it as “fakecon” (as in fake bacon), which she objected to. “It’s not fake, it’s turkey.”

Mmmmm.
As far as my knowledge goes, turkeys do not have a bacon cut. (If they did, Thanksgiving might’ve been a more memorable meal.) More
07 Sep 2012
by scolgin
in Recipes, Video
Tags: bacon, breakfast, cooking, Egg McMuffin, food, French toast, recipes, sandwich, smoked salmon
Once, many eons ago, when tweets and clouds were still part of nature, when “kindle” meant to build a fire and men knew not of their brethren’s minute-by-minute status, there was the Egg McMuffin. The prototypical breakfast sandwich, the one that started it all.

French toast bacon breakfast sandwich
In reality, there have probably been breakfast sandwiches for as long as there has been two slices of bread and an egg to put between them. More
04 Sep 2012
by scolgin
in Good Gadget, Bad Gadget, Observations
Tags: bacon, chickens, cooking, food, kitchen gadgets, pizza cutters, Rachel's Table, Target
One of the new little chickens in our coop died today. Something happened to its legs, which for chickens — like horses — is pretty much a death sentence.

New chicks (and two Guineafowl) at the water bowl
I’ve gotten used to a chicken dying occasionally — they get stuck in strange places, the coyotes get them, etc. — so it doesn’t phase me so much. Less blasé, however, am I than the chickens themselves. They just sort of step over their dead friend and continue about their business, casting each other glances every so often as if to say, “What’ya suppose is the matter with Larry?” More
03 Jul 2012
by scolgin
in Pork, Recipes, World's Best Sandwiches
Tags: bacon, barbecue, BBQ, burgers, cooking, grill, marmalade, recipes, summer, Tabasco
There is a condiment unlike any other — a glistening concoction that will transform your burgers from fine to sublime, and that will have your summertime guests kneeling at your feet in reverence, O’ God of the Barbecue. And I will share it with you, here, now, just in time for the 4th!

Bacon onion marmalade
This is not a condiment for vegetarians or the tentative. I call it bacon onion marmalade. And it is the anecdote to mediocre summer burgers. You may even want to bring a little stash with you when someone invites you to their barbecue. More
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